瞳をとじて

朝目覚める度(ﾀﾋﾞ)に　君の抜け殻(ｶﾞﾗ)が横にいる
ぬくもりを感じた　いつもの背中が冷たい
苦笑(ﾆｶﾞﾜﾗ)いをやめて　重いカーテンを開けよう
眩(ﾏﾌﾞ)しすぎる朝日　僕と毎日の追いかけっこだ

あの日　見せた泣き顔
涙照らす夕陽　肩のぬくもり
消し去ろうと願う度(ﾀﾋﾞ)に
心が　体が　君を覚えている

Your love forever
瞳を閉じて　君を描くよ　それだけでいい
たとえ季節が　僕の心を　置き去りにしても

いつかは君のこと　なにも感じなくなるのかな
今の痛み抱いて　眠る方がまだ　いいかな
あの日　見てた星空
願いかけて　二人探した光は
瞬(ﾏﾀﾀ)く間に消えてくのに
心は　体は　君で輝いてる

I wish forever
瞳をとじて　君を描くよ　それしか出来ない
たとえ世界が　僕を残して　過ぎ去ろうとしても

（Uh--- )
Oh----- hu-----
Your love forever
瞳をとじて　君を描くよ　それだけでいい
たとえ季節が　僕を残して　色を変えようとも
記憶の中に君を探すよ　それだけでいい
なくしたものを　越える強さを　君がくれたから
君がくれたから

5 days more

but now i am feeling very helpless~
why? despite that i revise everything liao, why do i still forget?
why i can't do the past year at all...
why everything look so unfamiliar to me?
i felt i wasted my time last week..

then my health, getting very bad.. everywhere is aching..
i getting heart burn, pain at somewhere near my kidney.. is my kidney going to fail me at such a young age?
my legs, is also failing me... i felt that i am going to have a big health problem soon...
life really sux on me... i can't wait for holiday to come but at the same time, i am worried for the relase of result, yet i wish it comes earlier...

i'm afraid... will i fail OS? will i fail linear? will i get a U for music?
i'm getting very paranoid... at times i just feel like dying... but then i dun want to suffer before i die.. even if i wanna die, i also wanna enjoy before dying..

yesterday was suppose to be OS revision day, but i kept slping and slping and read a bit of linear and watch the god-damn tv... i can't concentrate at home.. the more i read linear, the more i felt lost.. worse still, i can't cry to destress, my tear can't flow... i need hirai's songs to cry...

瞳をとじて ~ the only song which will probably made me cry now...
POP STAR ~ the only song that make me ABIT genki...

haiz... i hate the current me... if i fail OS, then i will take it year 2 sem 2. if i fail linear, i would probably not take it at all... again.. maybe maths 2 suits me better.. i dunno.. but maybe maths 2 will kill me even more..

BUT I DUN WANNA FAIL ANY OF THESE!!!

then~ a friend make me worry too...

10 more days to my heaven

to think that i thought i can study with kkg tml.. i found out that i had to go back sch tml coz tml is the dateline for lab 8 submission... sian~
if i had knew earlier, i would probably submit it this morning when i went back with miyabi~ haiz

anyway, who to blame except me?

progress for every module is well but brief
and no progress for discrete
but i am ok
grades is not that impt liao la.. (do i sound like lying?)

and now i haven done finish any of the past year paper.. sian~
haven decide if i will stay in sch tml after submission or will go back find kkg,
but one thing that i can confirm is that tonight need to read more topic etc so that tml can use the morning time on lab 8... no choice~

CS1102CY November 2004 paper

Note that this paper is more difficult due to the fact that it is from C and not java. i have previously printed wrongly, but decided to go on with it since the concepts are the same. My answer maybe not be correct, so u might wanna comment on it

1) c
2) unsure
3) d
4) a
5) c
6) d
7) c
8) b
9) b (not sure)
10) i thought it was b but junkai make me think that it has no answer

tml is the worse and best day

submission date for cs2106 project.

after this, i think my mood will be much better..
but fully not till after exams ba~

how i wish that i can now go cash studio with kkg...

chimes with dapne and shufen

tokyo with jie (haha)

anyway... things get quite weird recently...

and lifes have too many ups and downs in a day..
suddenly happy, suddenly sad, suddenly happy, suddenly sad...
i going to be siao too

then recently, cannot eat well... maybe is a bad sign... maybe is a good sign..

kkg, have u all decided what to do on kodomo no hi? cash studio? sashimi?
i am so looking forward to the day~~ (^_^)

i just thought of sth today. when someone ask me about someone..haiz..

anyway, NUH's curry chicken noodles make me sick... so actually now i very hungry since i din finish up the food.. *self pity me*

HOLIDAY HOLIDAY HOLIDAY~~

alot of shopping to do!! but miyabi is hunting for a job leh~~ haiz.. mayu, we go shop by ourself ba~ haha... anyway, anyone who has high pay job pls offer me.. i will take the highest and offer miyabi with the second.. haha.. no IT-related jobs please.. give my brain a rest... erm... erm.. but i am agreeable to .NET related.. haha..

kkg has manage to go japan *claps for them* (T_T)
haiz.. mixed feeling~ happy and sad..
happy for them
sad for me?
coz i think i will feel lonely in singapore..
21st bday without them... quite sian... so suchun must try to make me happy, k? haha
but if is me, i will also go.. be it whoever 21st bday.. haha(i'm selfish)
gotta save up more so that can ask them buy many many things back..

shufen, daphne, quick confirm with me about the overnight stay at my house ba~ esp since shufen is going to start work pretty soon~

ps: from the previous ps, one day i felt it wasn't him, one day i felt is was him. but then see another person, then i change my mind again.. i'm so fickle-minded.. but i like the way i am... haha

count down 17 days to my heaven

finally finish integration despite of a bug inside..

i hate the feeling of being useless.. it really sux.. but i guess i need to get used to it..

anyway, i just hope that the bug will not cause any big problem for us, as well as no more re-doing.. i am sick of it...

despite that nice yc had offer to debug for me, but i dun really know what's the bug, and i believe he is also busy with his work, so i dun dare to ask him. anyway, i hope that i can be like him during next sem...

then abt the breaking down.. daphne and shufen, thanks and sorry.. i'm really happy that u can understand why i mean and how i feel.. esp that daphne also had such feelings.. sorry to make u guys stuck at the stinky toilet with me for so long.. i think i am ok liao.. 17 more days and i will be back to normal..

today is a days with too much mixed feeling
embarressment + happy + sad + depress + joy + anger + ..... countless of feelings..
dun talk to me abt the cookies anymore.. it is getting on my nerves..

as for kkg, i have been trying my best to not show any of my stress infront of u to prevent any arguments coz i really dun like that.. so please dun blame me liao.. i already trying my best. (ps: in case we really ended up with any arguments, pls dun say that i ... nvm..)

anyway, my eyes is still very pain from the afternoon incident..

i think i becoming more and more ah lian liao...

WHY SOME XXX CANNOT XXXXXXXXXX THAT XXXXXXXXX IS XXXX XXXXXXXXX XXXX THE XXXXXXX XXXX XXXXX IS XXXXXXXX XXXXXX AND XXXXXXXXX XXX XX IT. AT XXXXXX I XXXXX TO XXXXX THAT XXX IS XXXX XXXXXXXXX THAN XXXXXXXXX. IF XXXX IS XXXXX XXXX XXXXXXXX, THEN XXX XX XX A XXXXX XXXX XXXXXXX XXXXXXX XXXX XX? I XXXXXXX XXXX XXX XXXX XXXXXXXXX XX XX XXXX XXXXXXXX.

phew~ i feel so much better..

at times, i wonder if i have too many tomodachi that i am taking some for granted, or am i too nice to some that they take me for granted? which ways sounds more logical? both ba i think.. coz at least i know that i have been taking liyan for granted... but since poly, many ppl take me for granted, and i din expected it to extend till uni.. and ...... haiz.. anyway, i must really try not to take anyone for granted, coz it really feel horrible...

daphne and i came out with one conclusion last week. LEOS is usually a taker and not a giver, but when a LEO give u, appreciate ba, coz u really mean something to them. but it does not means anything special..

ps: from yesterday ps, i kept looking at the back and ask if he is the one, and realise that he shouldn't be.. i think i am really only attracted by the age ba.. haha. there is only 2 zoodiac that i like.. secret~

count down 18 days to my heaven

i feel like killing anyone who is getting their heaven earlier than i do..

anyway.. this is not the main point.. alot of things is abit dissapointing today.
but there is also things to cheer...
1. my "uncompleted" project works well on both Linux and UNIX *claps claps claps
2. some friendship is blooming (i hope)
3. slightly destressed (bought a white bag, and had some good food at crystal jade)
4. postponed some study group, but abit to get everything revised in time (if i can finished my project by tml)
5. got my cute cute pencils~

things that is sad
1. lab7, lab8, cs2106
2. the white bag i bought is too heavy for me to bring to sch.. i think still my muji parachute bag is good.. anyway, the white bag can be used for shopping with kkg etc..
3. woke up late today.. very late.. i woke up abt 25mins before the start of my 1st lecture.. thus, i have already took cab for 9 continuous days... i do not wish for it to happen tml, but again, i need to reach sch early to print linear algebra past year paper.. damn it.. i'm broke

ps: from yesterday ps, i ponder and think that i haven found the person.. if he is the person, then i wouldn't dreamt of another person instead last night

"which is more important? intelligence or money?"

give me a break

i sank into depression at approx 5pm today... alot of things are yet to be done and exam is also coming~ revision is not done, project is not completed, and worse still, my labs are not done and my thursday test is not revised.. yes, i S/U it, but it doesn't mean that i can leave it to die either..

i know that daphne is worried for me when she insisted that i go back home.. but i dun dare to go home.. my niece is at my house(i thought) and with the stress that i am having, i'm so worried that i flare up on her... but i still left with daphne~ her bf fetch me back.. when i alighted, i called shufen.. coz she is probably the only one(apart from daphne and liyan) who can understand my depression.. sorry shufen.. i know you have a test tml and you still listen to my grumbles for more than 20mins.. i really need to flare up coz i wasn't able to cry.. while i thought that crying can release stress, my tears just dun flow.. so i had to scream.. sorry sorry~~ i promise that i will cook nice nice food when u and daphne camp over at my place during the holidays~

i am trying my best to crawl out from my depression and i hope that i dun indirectly stress anyone else... minna-san gomen ne~

ps: i found the person... did i?

sweet sweet~~

recently we had a stupid game in my clique.. we sms each other a stupid sms and ask the person for the reply... i generally receive good replies, so it makes me feel happy... haha

anyway, that's not my main aim of this entry.. recently i have been taking bus back with daphne since there is some company... i really enjoy talking to her esp after when she told me bad things she heard abt me in NYP and she feel that all is fake gossips after she know me.. =)

thanks~~

but of coz, i can understand abt the bad gossips la..

when u are a nobody, u will have no good gossips and no bad gossips

but when u are a LITTLE somebody, you will have LITTLE good gossips and ALOT OF bad gossips..

ps: shufen, daphne, let's be "sisters" forever with kim yoong... =) hahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahaha

today, my last 2 weeks, holiday plans

finally pass shuhan her bday present.. quite worried that i will forget to bring... ask rendy to remind me her also din... haha
talking abt rendy.. i can't help remembering abt the rich, poor, sugar daddy, sugar mummy thingy... will write here if i have the time..

left 2 weeks.. and i am already looking forward to next month.. while lots of things is needed to be completed now, i also trying my very best to work on other stuffs..
have already planned on my holidays, including going to kkg's house and throw all their t-shirts to bobby, shopping and more shopping, drama and more drama, gathering and more gathering, as well as planning of party.. today i cancel someone off in my heart(from the list).. am i fair to him?

i dunno...

shuhan san~

誕生日おめでとう

How to make an egg, Guangzhou style

During a recent raid on a wholesale centre in Guangzhou city, the capital of China's Guangdong province, a large quantity of fake eggs was seized.

Their wholesale price is 0.15 yuan (S$0.03) each - half the price of a real egg.

Consumers have a hard time telling a genuine egg from a fake one. This is good news for unscrupulous entrepreneurs, who are even conducting three-day courses in the production of artificial eggs for less than S$150.

A reporter with Hong Kong-based Chinese magazine East Week enrolled in one such course.

To create egg white, the instructor - a woman in her 20s - used assorted ingredients such as gelatin, an unknown powder, benzoic acid, coagulating material and even alum, which is normally used for industrial processes.

For egg yolk, some lemon-yellow colouring powder is mixed to a liquid and the concoction stirred. The liquid is then poured into a round-shaped plastic mould and mixed with so-called 'magic water', which contains calcium chloride.

This gives the 'yolk' a thin outer membrane, firming it up.

The egg is then shaped with a mould. The shell is not forgotten. Paraffin wax and an unidentified white liquid are poured onto the fake egg, which is then left to dry.

The artificial egg can be fried sunny-side up or steamed. Although bubbles appear on the white of the egg, those who have tasted it say the fake stuff tastes very much like the real thing.

But experts warn of the danger of eating fake eggs.

Not only do they not contain any nutrients, a Hong Kong Chinese University professor warned that long-term consumption of alum could cause dementia.

today is a sad and happy day

sad ~ had a fight.. or a quarrel.. i cry and cry.. twice..

happy ~ sis bought me alot of stuff from japan~~ =) and we even plan to save up and go tokyo next year... sis ask me to save more for my shopping.. so does it means i get accomodation and air ticket sponsored? =p

apart from the normal plan ~ patrick came to look for me today.. while i was having dinner with doreen... he had actually told doreen that i am "nu wang"(something like queen) in my poly... haha... issit? but i understand that he came due to my morning sms.. i'm really touched.... i think he can feel that it wasn't an april fool joke..

anyway abt april fool.. i din have the mood to irritate anyone this year... last year i irritate a few ppl by saying that i'm in hospital and got them very worried.. afterall.. they made me feel that they are also very concern abt me.. thanks~

so fast~ week 12

actually i had alot in mind to write~ but then i had just went to the OS website and was reminded of the extra lab coming up.. sux...
shall write abt today interesting event tml...

*sheares Chicken Naan is really good~ YUMMY~*
kim, you miss the great thing~