5 days more

but now i am feeling very helpless~
why? despite that i revise everything liao, why do i still forget?
why i can't do the past year at all...
why everything look so unfamiliar to me?
i felt i wasted my time last week..

then my health, getting very bad.. everywhere is aching..
i getting heart burn, pain at somewhere near my kidney.. is my kidney going to fail me at such a young age?
my legs, is also failing me... i felt that i am going to have a big health problem soon...
life really sux on me... i can't wait for holiday to come but at the same time, i am worried for the relase of result, yet i wish it comes earlier...

i'm afraid... will i fail OS? will i fail linear? will i get a U for music?
i'm getting very paranoid... at times i just feel like dying... but then i dun want to suffer before i die.. even if i wanna die, i also wanna enjoy before dying..

yesterday was suppose to be OS revision day, but i kept slping and slping and read a bit of linear and watch the god-damn tv... i can't concentrate at home.. the more i read linear, the more i felt lost.. worse still, i can't cry to destress, my tear can't flow... i need hirai's songs to cry...

瞳をとじて ~ the only song which will probably made me cry now...
POP STAR ~ the only song that make me ABIT genki...

haiz... i hate the current me... if i fail OS, then i will take it year 2 sem 2. if i fail linear, i would probably not take it at all... again.. maybe maths 2 suits me better.. i dunno.. but maybe maths 2 will kill me even more..

BUT I DUN WANNA FAIL ANY OF THESE!!!

then~ a friend make me worry too...